"There were girls who were prettier, more intelligent and just as talented. Why didn't they make it? It's a question of magic. You either have it or you don't."

"We could do more with the quiver of a lip or the shrug of a shoulder than all the nude men and women today. It was tintillation. It showed a look of innocence that we never see now."

"The thing about happiness is that it doesn't help you to grow; only unhappiness does that. So I'm grateful that my bed of roses was made up equally of blossoms and thorns."

"Honeymoon first, and if it lasts, then marriage. I like that."

"Whether someone is straight, gay, or neuter has little to do with employability in my business."

"In Hollywood we were like fish swimming around in an aquarium-- always the same fish, but forming different combinations."

"Getting close isn't enough. They want to count your pores."

"The truth is like surgery, it cuts, but it cures."

"I want a man who has the brains to be satisfied with only me."

"Left to my own devices, I'd starve to death-- I can't boil water."

"How does it happen that something that makes so much sense in the moonlight doesn't make any sense in the sunlight?"

"MGM prepared us for stardom but not for life."

"I have a glorious life. I can do anything I want, go where I want, be alone if I want, travel if I want, and sometimes I don't want anything. Now isn't that a blessing?"

"When you accept God, you're never alone."

"No one I've ever met has more power than Louis B. Mayer, and that includes the president of the United States."

"I have never broken up a home."

"I like the boys, and the boys like me."

"I can't face the day or an audience without vodka."

"I would rather lose a good earring than be caught without make-up."

"I've always loved a challenge."

"Humor has been the balm of my life, but it's been reserved for those close to me, not part of the public Lana."

"The truth is, sex doesn't mean that much to me now. It never did"

"A gentleman is simply a patient wolf."

"I'm so gullible. I'm so damn gullible. And I am so sick of me being gullible."

"I'm bold and I'm scheming, and sometimes I think I'm not quite nice." (Green Dolphin Street)

"It's said in Hollywood that you should always forgive your enemies - because you never know when you'll have to work with them."

"Trash is something you get rid of - or disease. I'm not something you get rid of."

"My life has been a series of emergencies."

 

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Lou Valentino